My Chemical Romance

Megan is tired of my Fourth of July post and frankly - so am I. I have just been so busy and now I have been getting ready for my fabulous vacation. But before I head out I thought I would set the stage for my return.

I have come to the realization that I really need to get off the fake food! Don't get me wrong here, I love Jenny Craig but Im gettin a little itchy on these frozen dinners and packaged things. I mean it has been more than a year now.

I began to develop a concern about my fake food addiction not so much with the Jenny Craig food that I was eating – for I needed that to get my diet under control. (I had to start somewhere.) I became concerned with the onset of a particularly strange love affair I nurtured for Cool Whip. I mean to say that I put Cool Whip on everything, Have you ever read the ingredients for Cool Whip? There simply is no food in it. I can not pronounce any of the ingredients and I don’t know of a food group that any of those ingredients could be from. I was compelled to purchase mass quantities of Cool Whip each week at the grocery store. It was when I switched to the large Tub o’ Whip that I really became aware of what I was doing. What is this chemical? What is it doing to me? What are the long term effects of heavy doses of Cool Whip?

I began to pay uncomfortable attention to the other chemicals that I have grown fond of particularly my Coffee Mate Sugar Free French Vanilla Powder. What the hell is that? I am really not sure but every morning I jump out of bed because I am going to get some of that powder in my coffee and it will start my day right! Matt calls the Coffee Mate “cool creamer”. He drinks the regular liquid form of “cool creamer” basically he likes a little coffee with his French Vanilla creamer. A good day is when you have creamer and a bad day is when you are out.

I don’t know about the rest of you but this conspicuous consumption of powders and liquids that are concocted of un-pronounceable ingredients that represent nothing like real food is making me nervous. Coke, Pepsi, Sprite? At least wine has grape juice in it – I can deal with that. Splenda – it has been a little splendid but it is also a little spooky. I think that margarine product called “I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter” is hilarious. Of course we can’t believe its not butter – we have no freaking idea what it is, but as a society we seem to be ok with that.

Now if you are really looking for interesting reading about mystery things to put into your body look no further than the new weight loss aid Alli’s product description and side affects. Sorry, I wont go into that on this blog you will have to check that one out for yourself – absolutely too gross!

I am no health food nut. I like chocolate and wine and bread and all sorts of goodies that we need to eat in moderation only. But I just started wondering about the fake things I have been consuming. I wonder where they come from. I wonder how they are made. I wonder what those things will do to my body over the long term.

So I am going on vacation and I plan to eat real chocolate. I plan to eat incredible cheese. I especially plan to indulge in some magnificent wine and superb bread. When I come back I am embarking on a new diet journey. I need to end this chemical romance. I want to see if I can eat only food that I understand. Just food that makes sense, things I can pronounce and things that don’t appear to be altered too much. I realize this will be tough because even our toothpaste comes from China and has strange and harmful ingredients but I will just start out with my basic food and work my way up from there.

Sometimes I wake up and while drinking my powder infused chemically vanilla flavored coffee I wonder how we got so far from the simple things in life.